The Twins Have Arrived!

Well, the boys made it safely into the world! On June 25th at 8:18am and 8:20am Ian Thomas and Finn Thomas joined the Conway family. The c-section went as planned, but it was still the strangest experience ever. I didn't like the lose of control of my body at first, but then it was easy and I just laid back and waited to hear those two beautiful cries. Hearing those babies cry was awesome. They were here and they were breathing! Dr. Stietz even came to the delivery so he could check them out right when they were born. What a blessing that was to have a friendly face in the room that I trusted. When he looked me in the eyes and told me they were both doing great, I was then able to relax. The boys didn't need more oxygen than just the normal c-section stuff right when they came out. No oxygen beds, no tubes, no craziness. God blessed us with two healthy baby boys. Small but healthy. Finn was 5 lbs 8 oz, Ian was 4 lbs 6 oz.

While we were in the hospital, the boys were a little jaundice, but after a few days and some "suntanning" in my room their numbers were in a good range. We sent them to the nursery every night so we could get some good sleep and I could start to heal before we came home. Our nurses were outstanding and I am even more in love with the hospital this time around! Staying there for five days was an absolute must. I needed the rest before coming home to care for these babies. My mom came to see the babies most days, and Tristan was able to come twice. Tristan was more interested in my room, the presents, and the snacks than the actual babies. It was always an emotional thing for me to see T, I missed him so much while I was there. That was my first time away from him, but I knew he was in good hands. I knew he was having fun with Neannie because he was always happy to see me but never sad to leave with her.

After all the things that could have happened during pregnancy and/or after birth, we were left with two beautiful boys that ended up going home with me from the hospital. The one outcome I had not even let myself think about was being able to take BOTH babies home with me. I still can not believe what little miracles they are!

You Can't Know What You Don't Know

Everyone says with your second pregnancy you sometimes even forget that you are pregnant because you are chasing the other kid around. I don't think I have forgotten this pregnancy for more than about 5 minutes. After counting down weeks to get through all the critical steps, I then moved on to counting up the weeks and even days that they were just getting stronger and bigger. Well, now we have reached a stage that I honestly have not prepared for... the final count down. In ten days I will enter the hospital at six a.m. and prepare to have these babies. It is all strange to me this planning process. I know it sounds bad, but in my head I say to myself that I'm going to the hospital to have these babies cut out of me. I didn't think the whole c-section thing really bothered me, but as it turns out I'm not that thrilled about it. I know it is absolutely the safest thing for these babies (which is why I will still do it), I know that women do it everyday, and I know that no matter how these babies enter the world they are still my little bundles of joy. Another birth story involving twenty-four hours of labor does not sound that great to me either, but I just wonder how I will feel during/after the whole thing. The first time around I didn't see having Tristan naturally as some bonding experience or wonderful process, but now knowing I won't go through it has me nervous. I'm going to walk into the hospital feeling fine, get prepped for surgery, lay down and allow a doctor to cut me open and pull my babies out. Then my precious little babies that I have carried and thought about every minute of the last eight months will be rolled away while I lay there alone and start the recovery process. What is that going to be like? Will they be able to hang out with me in my room at all or will I have to "visit" them in the NICU with little privacy to just be with them. I keep reminding myself that it's short term, but I really enjoyed those first few days with Tristan just chilling in my room and getting to know each other. What a different experience this is going to be. Well, I have ten days to suck it up, learn to cope, and face this thing head on! I know I can do, I am strong, and I'm not afraid to cry if I need to.
I don't know what I would do if my mom was not going to be here with Tristan? I have never spent a night away from the little guy, but knowing that my mom will be here to care for him and play with him will give me the peace of mind to help me start to heal and to start taking care of my new little babies. Let's see what the next few weeks bring with it... joy, tears, depression, happiness, smiles? Well, the one thing I do know for sure is that there will be lots of love surrounding every step on the way.

Tristan's 2nd Birthday Party

We had a fun time celebrating Tristan's 2nd birthday with his little friends today. While the party was fun, I think Neil and I had more fun last night putting the "treat basket" together after T went to bed. Today we went to the mall play area because it was too cold to play outside. When will I learn that the end of April beginning of May in Colorado is TOTALLY unpredictable for weather. I thought the play area would not be too bad because the big kids would be in school... wrong! The local schools had the day off so it was a MAD HOUSE. Our kids held their own though, I was proud. Tristan had fun seeing his friends and they all brought him perfect gifts that he loves. Tomorrow we will spend the day as a family for his actual birthday and that sounds like a perfect day to me!

Maybe I'm NOT a sucker!

A really long time ago, I bought the My Baby Can Read series from someone on Craigslist. As soon as I got it home and showed it to Tristan I was sure I had been taken for a ride and I promptly labeled myself a sucker. The video is SO BORING it's almost painful to have on even in the background. I put it in the closet and thought about reselling it about 30 times. Well, last week I moved the box of DVDs out to the living room bookcase and popped in the starter DVD one more time after being encouraged from my mom to do so. To my surprise, Tristan liked it but only seems to half pay attention to it so I didn't know if he was getting anything out of it. Everyday since then he points to the box and says, "Baby, please." To be honest, if he wasn't asking for it I probably wouldn't have played it. I didn't think it would work, but I also knew it wouldn't hurt him.

Well, tonight I was putting T to bed and we were reading a story that had a page with a picture of a zoo on it. There were panda bears on one side and elephants on the other with a sign in between them pointing which way to go. I asked him where the elephants were and instead of pointing to the animal he pointed to the word elephant on the sign!!!! That is one of his My Baby Can Read words!!! I almost leapt out of the chair did a dance with him and ran out to tell Neil. Then I remembered that we were settling down to bed, but as soon as we were done I ran out to tell Neil. I am still in shock that it's working and I can't wait to see what else come from it!

Some Perspective

The first few months of this pregnancy were filled with surprises and worries. The surprises were great and the number of complications the doctors were looking for seemed to be endless. I went into information gathering mode reading everything I could about carrying two babies and what to do with them when they got here. Once the surprises and doctors calmed down, I was able to relax a little... for about a minute. Then came the never ending doctors bills and the long list of things that "needed" to happen before these babies arrived, but we had/have NO idea where the money for all of this will come from. I have spent a lot of time trying to find creative ways to gather baby items and scheduling doctors appointments and places for Tristan to spend time while we go look at yet another ultrasound. Today, however, was different. Today was the first day that I could not wait to meet my little boys. Finally I am thinking of them as just sweet little healthy babies. In the end it really doesn't matter if we can't get the bigger car (so we drive two vehicles when we go somewhere) or the bigger place (so we sell the dinning room table to make room for some swings), what really matters is that we have our family safe and sound and healthy. See you soon, boys!

Easter 2010

We had a lot of fun looking for eggs this morning. We had so much fun that we had to hide them about 5 times! Tristan was a natural and I think he will be ready for a big time egg hunt next year.

Tristan and his animal sounds...

The three things that I don't want to forget about Tristan at this age:

1) What a frog says

2) How he says "I love you"

3) The way he says "Mommy"

It can't be time...

I think Tristan is trying to tell me something that I kind of don't want to hear right now. I thought it was a cute "thing" that he did when he would be without his diaper after bath and go in and pee on the bathroom floor. Tonight he walked into the bathroom and peed ON the toilet. Literally ON the toilet because we don't have kids potty yet and he is obviously too short to reach. It was really cute, but I am just not ready to potty train him yet. I guess maybe we will just get a kids potty and let him go in it at night and see how that goes. 22 months old and I'm pregnant with twins... this is not really a task I was looking for.

20 Weeks

Well, I am 20 weeks pregnant now and probably more than half way through. I feel good, I feel strong, and I feel confident that these babies are nice and healthy. The specialist have calculated and measured and calculated again, and they look just perfect! I think we measured that last part of the anatomy to measure last week which was the lips, yes the lips. I didn't even know that was something they had to look at, but I guess when you look at them so often they must have to measure every little bit of them. I must say that they both have beautiful kissy lips that I can't wait to see... except that I can because they are nowhere near being done. You wouldn't know it by my belly though. You could sit and watch me grow. It's actually a new pass time in the household. Even Tristan is sure to check my belly each day to see just how big it's getting and then he gives it a kiss. I think he loves his brothers already. The babies looked so good last week that I have this week off from the doctors. It was thrilling to hear that they are doing so well, but to be honest it just feels good to feel a little "normal" with this pregnancy. For now, I will sit back and feel them dancing around like crazy.