We Threw A Strike With A Perfect Floor Routine!

Happy ten year anniversary to us!

Top ten things about being married to Neil Conway:

He encourages me in whatever I am passionate about

He has more patience than any man I know

He is generous with his time and resources

He's funny at the most unexpected times

He's willing to admit when he is wrong

He loves his children and shares my love for more of them!

He is always up for trying something new

He eats my cooking

He gets up with the first kid so I can sleep a little longer

And he has put up with me for 10 years!!

Ten years ago today, Neil and I promised to be together till death do us part. Hands down, the best decision we ever made! We worked that summer, living in a room in the back of a barn, to save up money to move across country away from everything we knew. Hands down the second best decision we ever made. With no friends and family to run to when times got a little tough, we learned how to work our problems out.

What's our secret? Well, I don't think it's any secret at all. I married my best friend! In ten years that passion comes and goes, our interests have changed, we have hopefully changed and matured, and life as well as the two of us look completely different than we did ten years ago. If you change with your best friend then it's a fun journey instead of something that comes between you.

On a more practical note, it's the two separate tubes of toothpaste, Neil learning to drink his coffee black, and me changing the way I fold clothes that has been the compromise to keep our house a comfortable place to live. Compromise alone can not make a happy marriage, but it can make for a happy home. It's not about one person losing, it's about having a healthy perspective and realizing the small details are just not that important. The way your father did something or my mother did that, are just that... the way THEY did it. The last ten years have given us a start to finding the way WE do things. If we didn't find our "we", then what would our kids have to argue about with their future spouses, haha.

It wasn't in the cards for us to take a trip to Paris or even Napa Valley for our big anniversary, but I don't care. What really matters after all this time is that we still would want to spend time together! We decided to do something really radical and not like us at all. We needed to surprise ourselves and prove to each other that we are not done becoming who we will be. We did something radical, out of our box, meaningful, and most importantly together.

This tattoo design is from the cover of our wedding invitation . Mom, did you think when we chose this design at the table in Denny's eleven years ago, that we were actually picking out our tattoos?

I can't believe the amazingly blessed life we have been given these last ten years. It's almost overwhelming to me to think of more blessings in the next ten years to come! Year ten was a long and sleepless one that really tested us. Here is to smooth sailing into year eleven! (hey, we can hope)

Just What We All Needed

The other day was a very long day. Tristan was just being a three-year-old and it wore me down. By the time Neil got home from work, Tristan was headed into the bath. Neil and I were trying to figure out our weekend schedule with the kids since we both had to work. It was getting a little frustrating especially at the end of a rather difficult day. Somewhere in the middle of the tension, Tristan mentioned that we should all get in the tub. Dismissively, I turned and said, "Tristan, we are NOT getting in the...," but didn't get to finish that sentence. Neil was walking past me and climbed into the tub clothes and all! Tristan was in shock. For about a minute all he could say was, "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!"
He defused the situation for sure and had us all laughing really hard. Good dad, good husband!"

Rub-a-dub-dub

With the twins new mobility, they are constantly into Tristan's toys and personal space. They have always loved him and any attention he gives them. Tristan, on the other hand, is not always so thrilled to share or be bothered. The last couple of weeks, he has gotten A LITTLE better. He seems to at least want to be around them a little more. Even when he is not playing with them, they stand near by watching and pretending they are playing with him. I find him being sweet to them when I'm not looking. Tristan sings songs to them, crawls around on the floor, gets them laughing hysterically, and just the other day started to hug them. I hope things continue to get better with their relationship. I keep telling Tristan that he will thank me one day for his brothers.

Dedication

On Mother's Day we dedicated the twins at church. In traditional churches, there is a baptism for babies but our church believes that it's every person's right to choice their baptism when they are old enough. Instead, this ceremony is more about the parents. We dedicated to raise these boys in such a way that they would have an understanding of God and would with all hope choose Him when they were older.

We did this same promise with Tristan. When we dedicated the raising of Tristan, it felt like something we really wanted for him. With a few years of parenting under our belt, this promise felt different. It felt more intentional, more serious, and more doable than the first time.

Neil and I have observed multiple ways of teaching kids about God through our upbringings, youth ministry, and most of our friends. My personal observation is that more people turn away from God after attending church as kid/teen because of many reasons, one being a disconnect between what they hear at church and what they see at home. So as Neil prayed our prayer for Finn and Ian that God would always call loudly to them and that we would teach them how to listen, I also promised to try my best to live a life worthy for them to watch.

Finn and Ian won't remember this day, although I will show them adorable pictures of them in their outfits. They didn't understand the words we prayed for them that day. My hope is that one day they feel we have lived up to our true job as parents and we meet back at the church for a baptism... matching outfits for that one? Hey, a mother can dream.

And then he was three

Tristan turned three today and I can hardly believe it. We had a nice morning opening presents and hanging out waiting to go to "old McDonalds" for his party. Since he is three, we invited three friends to his party. I almost changed at the last minute, but after we got to the party I felt confident in my decision. He was able to play with all of his friends and it felt less like a romper room that it probably would have. They played, had happy meals, sundaes, cake pops, and presents. What little kid could ask for more?

The twins brought their own dates and had a fabulous time! They were so good I kept forgetting they were there.

I remember birthday parties at McDonalds when I was growing up and thinking they were so much fun. I hope Tristan remembers this birthday as fondly as I remember mine.

Each birthday that Tristan has had so far, I have teared up at some point in the day. This year, the tears did not come when we ran into his room to sing Happy Birthday when he woke up, or opening presents, or at his party, or at the usual time when the group sings Happy Birthday at the party I thought maybe I was over all of that. Maybe this year I was finally getting less emotional about the passing years and my baby growing up. Then... we got home and put the babies to bed. Everything was quiet while Neil got Tristan's room ready for his nap and I flopping down in the big green chair to catch my breath. When I looked up, I saw Tristan laying on his belly in the living room playing with his Legos that he opened this morning. He had a whole story going between the Lego guys and was so deep in play that he didn't even notice I was there. That's when it hit me just how big he was getting! The play was so imaginative and independent. I wanted to go jump in and play with the birthday boy, but I could tell he didn't need me there. Well, maybe next year I won't cry.