Grandma Jane

It funny how I never called Grandma "Grandma Jane" growing up, but ever since she started writing that in cards to Tristan and the boys that was how she was known in this house.

Tonight I made an apple pie to honor the good memories of Grandma Kurgan who passed away early this morning. I made an apple pie because it was one of the favorite things that everyone loved about my grandma, but I made my mom's recipe because she's my favorite thing my grandma ever made.

In the days before Grandmas were all Mema, Nana, Grammy, and Ya Ya there was Grandma Kurgan. She didn't get down on the floor and play with us or run outside with the hose and jump in the Bush's pool for the biggest cannonball, but there were always treats ready for us when we arrived and a bag of goodies to take home with us when we left. In those days we could afford to eat those snacks because her house was always 1008 degrees and we sweat off any calories we took in. Maybe that's the lesson she was trying to teach me... I better go turn up my heat now while I eat this cookie.

She always made sure we had a new shirt for back to school or the sweater for my Brownies outfit. She would sneak me some cash as a teenager and save her quarters for my laundry in college. I always knew that on Halloween a card would arrive with money for a McDonalds dinner... thought of her when I went to pick up Tristan's this year.

I always thought it was neat to have grandparents that were 100% Polish. I don't know why, I guess it's because now a days I don't really meet anyone who is 100% anything. I admired how hard my grandparents worked for all they had and all they gave to their children.

As a family who celebrates everything with food, I will always remember the galumpkis she made for my birthdays, the perogies, bapka, and strangely her coleslaw. What will endear me to my grandparents though are Apples. No matter where I go, when I see apples, apple pie, apple trees, cider, or anything claiming to be an apple fritter (but never will be) I think of them. I am instantly brought back to that hot little kitchen with the instant coffee and silverware draw in the strangest place. Looking out the big window at Grandpa's flowers, the little bird bath, and the bushes of bleeding hearts that I thought were the most amazing flowers. I remember Uncle Greg falling asleep on the living room floor while Grandpa teased Alex and we all pretended to watch whatever was on the three channels they had on tv. We were all too sleepy from the heat to complain and getting Grandpa a cold beer from the fridge was our only relief from the sauna.

Grandma always had a soft spot for Neil ever since their first meeting. He hung out with Alex and did the dishes and in her book that made for a good man. She was right.

I can't say that I am sad that she is gone, I have not seen her in some time and phone conversations became too difficult a while ago. She was not comfortable and slept most of the time. In the end I believe she is in a better place now, as are all the family members who continued to care for and worry about her. However, it is strange to lose my final grandparent. It's like the end of an era. It's like the world just got a little smaller for me. Strange, I know, because it was just one person, but it's like she was a final placeholder for a whole generation in my eyes. Good-bye Grandma Kurgan, our fond memories of you will be remembered through us, your grandchildren.